Bringing you honest reviews of recent releases
Matilda Lutz – Julia
Alex Roe – Holt Anthony
Aimee Teegarden – Skye Johnston
Johnny Galecki – Gabriel Brown
Vincent D’Onofrio – Galen Burke
Bonnie Morgan – Samara
Everything – or most things – come full circle, including The Ring it seems. In more ways than one.
The 2002 horror has returned, and I must say I was surprised when I first saw the trailer for this installment; I thought Samara had been well and truly flushed away. Alas, like a larger-than-normal poop she didn’t quite make it down the pipe and has resurfaced to cause more havoc for those who watch ‘that tape’.
This time round it’s doomed Julia the stringy-haired predator is after, but the movie takes a dark (yes – even darker) twist when it is discovered Samara doesn’t just want to be acknowledged. She wants to be reborn..
I have to say, this movie is fucking shocking. It is one of the most tame horrors I have ever seen, lacking drastically in suspense as well as failing to supply the frights. Rings is on a par with the likes of I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997); I.E. a mix of B-list and very unfamiliar backing actors thrown together to play out a sinister story which has a very uninteresting script and lack of scene excitement. As well as this, it seems as though a powercut ocurred whilst filming due to 80% of the movie being shot at night or in dark rooms. It’s not great, and makes for a tediously dull watch. This movie feels as though it runs on one consistently monotonous level, with very few jumpy moments; it is neither thrilling nor terrible – it just.. happens.
I was very surprised to see the likes of Big Bang Theory‘s Johnny Galecki taking part in this production; massive step down the career ladder for him!
Rings does contain a few jumpy moments, so indulge in these – but otherwise it’s an unnecessary instalment.
In fact, I think the only thing I found effective about this movie overall is the fact a brick-built object outside my gym resembles something Samara would pop out of.
Yes, I walked past this the day after seeing Rings and almost shit myself. The only effect the movie had on me.
I beg of you – let this one slide.
And pretend you never saw it in that bargain bin in town.