Charlize Theron – Charlotte Field, U.S. Secretary of State
Seth Rogen – Fred Flarsky
June Diane Raphael – Maggie
O’Shea Jackson – Lance
Andy Serkis – Parker Wembley
Bob Odenkirk – President Chambers
Alexander Skarsgård – James Steward
What on earth was this?
A shabby, recently resigned journalist attends a charity function where he bumps into a childhood friend (who happens to be Secretary of State), and rekindles their relationship. Subsequently leading to a new job, this journalist spends the rest of the film acting like a stroppy adult child and bad-mouthing anyone / anything he can. Rogen does no favours for his career here with a performance lacking the comedy needed to bring this script to screen. Even when his character receives (not much of) a wardrobe overhaul the actor’s inability to change to a different level of dramatics means a half-arsed moderate effort. But seeing as this is Hollywood and he is Seth Rogen he again wings it on the basis that he’s an A-lister with casting security. What a qualification, eh?
There’s no spark at all, the whole thing runs like a mediocre first draft of a comedy, and Theron only just manages to scrape what was written by Dan Sterling off the floor with her sassy and dry-humoured character. In fact some scenes lack so badly in funny stuff it’s hard to tell if this movie is more of a drama than a comedy (the moment Fred and Charlotte are caught in the middle of a terrorist explosion installs more of a sense of fear and danger). And as the movie progresses we get little more than a lover’s tiff when Fred gets closer to her in order to learn more about her for his writing, but the tension begins. There are a few soppy moments focusing on their developing relationship, but the overall mood feels pathetic. Not one bit of dialogue between any of the characters passes for entertaining – it becomes the most average comedy you could ever see.
Sorry but not even a stupid poster of the lead pair waving like juveniles at passing people will win me over. It just looks like Theron and Rogen bouncing off people in real life at a premiere or something. Is this publicity supposed to reel me in? I’m sure there have been people out there reacting to the poster in ways such as, “oh look – those two are sure having a fun time. I bet this movie is hilarious”.
It’s not.
Oh, the irony. I bet it really was a long shot for the producer to bring this concept to the table seeking for it to be commissioned. Remarkably, whoever gave it the green light managed to find something funny about it. And they have to have one of the poorest tastes in comedy known to man. Long Shot is basically two actors given a plot which lacks so highly in imagination that you’d be forgiven for thinking it was based on real events – with the juicy stuff removed.
Man goes to party and bumps into a woman he knew growing up – not overly eventful.
Woman gives man a job – not unheard of.
Man and woman fall for each other – not unusual; happens everywhere all the time.
I can honestly state that there is nothing worth watching Long Shot for other than one or two (three absolute maximum) giggles.
There may be some funny lines spoken but the comedic value ends there, and if I was someone involved in the execution of this movie I would feel sick at the thought of rinsing a budget of around $40 million. Mainly because the two leads and filming locations simply do not warrant that sum of money. Theron is nowhere near the level of entertaining as some other women out there (Meryl Streep for example – sheer versatile talent). And Rogen – he’s just not hilarious enough, proving to be more like the funny guy you’d meet at a house party who stands spouting a lot of observational humour whilst clutching a beer can, most people around him hooting with laughter (a few others just think he’s a dick).
The title of this movie is pure irony. It really was a long shot.